Freedom and Chaos

My friend Javier from Mexico and I had lunch today at the vegetarian restaurant near campus. I like Javier a lot. He is thoughtful and because he is older (he's got a wife and kids back home), we can share our deep thoughts about living in Taiwan. I think his English is probably not so great, because I have to speak Spanish with him. So, today at lunch, I think my Spanish improved by about 26% over the course of an hour and a half lunch consisting of various fake meats.

We both like a lot of things about Taiwanese society. Like the fact that, for the most part, you are safe, even walking at night. When I am on the subway, I am not worried about my wallet, even when the train is packed. When I put my bag down for a second and look away while I am waiting for my bus, I don't worry whether someone is going to steal it.

The other night, Javier saw someone walking by the river near school. At 11 o'clock at night. You can't do that in Mexico, because people will think you are bad and you are doing something illegal. You might get killed.

When I came back to the States after living in Taiwan for nine months, that is one of the things I noticed. People's shit is always being broken into or stolen in the U.S. You've always got to keep an eye out.

One time, I went to do my laundry and left my back porch open by accident. When I came back, I found that most of my CD collection was stolen. I found a whopper (that's a burger from Burger King, that the thief had abandoned) on my porch. Someone had jumped the railing and took my CDs. Unbelievable.

The other thing that both Javier and I agreed upon, that is true in both Mexico and in the States, is that there is a plethora of drugs floating around, and that definitely has an influence on society. To me, it sounds like most Taiwanese people learn about drugs (we're talking illegal drugs, folks) from the paper and movies.

But for us folks in the U.S. and Mexico, if you aren't living in a small-ass country bumpkin town (and even then you're not assured), you're going to know someone who is doing drugs, or someone who knows someone who is doing drugs. You're going to have a friend at work who used to be a drug addict and now is clean. Or, maybe that "bad" kid who smoked cigarettes in the parking lot at school, well, you found out he died when you were 24.

You go to the local drugstore or pizza place, and you look at the guy at the register and maybe it seems like he's a little off. He's not retarded, he just smokes a lot of weed.

Whether you know it or not, drugs pervade America. People at the highest level of the corporate world are coming home and snorting coke. On the weekends, their employees are going to clubs and doing ecstasy.

Marijuana (weed) is so pervasive, and I would say it is abused. Where I come from, in California, there are people who are using weed to get away from reality. (Um, I think people are doing this in other states, too.) They smoke it first thing in the morning every morning. They are spaced out. They are angry. They are inconsistent and apathetic.

Drugs aren't a simple topic to discuss. A question we might want to ask is this, whether or not drugs are pervasive, why do people take them? What are they escaping from? What are the conditions that lead people to have no desire to drug themselves?

Of course, I know that drugs are a problem in Taiwan, but I don't think you can compare the situation with the States.

Taiwan does a pretty good job of protecting its kids from the dangers of drugs. It seems that they are not that plentiful, and the society provides support for them, like an extended family and a safe living environment. It also helps that they are about six times busier than American kids of their age, preparing for their all-important high school and university entrance exams. They leave for school at seven in the morning and come back home from their cram school at ten at night.

I quoted someone who said that because the United States is the freest of countries, that it also means that there is more fucked-up shit going on there. I like freedom, and I see how in some ways, people in Taiwan, because of their more conservative culture, lack some of the freedom of expression we enjoy in the States. I think this is why my Taiwanese friend Gene says she would like to leave Taiwan.

I think she would probably want to come back here, though, later.

One of the things I also like about living in Taiwan is that gives me a new perspective on things that we're used to taking for granted, things like "society" and "freedom". You travel and you see that these concepts change from place to place. And most people don't question them at all.

Javier and I could have talked for a few more hours. We were finished with our fake chickens, the waitress cleared our plates and then we said adios.

On True Love

Someone said that finding true love is beyond words, something which brings us a feeling of peace and contentment.

Like winning the lotto.

Sitting in a Corner at Eslite Reading Poetry

There are times when I just need to talk English with a native speaker. When I need to express myself in an uncensored way, using all the idioms and verbal phrases and cultural references and nuances that make English so hard for Taiwanese people.

On most days, I am happy enough with the cultural learning and stretching that happens in Taiwan, some good Taiwanese friends, along with other goodies. But I find that every once in a while, perhaps after a hard day of studying Chinese, when I am discouraged, or when I'm feeling homesick for Berkeley, I need a taste of home.

However, unlike some foreigners here, I don't have that many foreign friends. This is not accidental. I am living in Taipei, trying to learn Chinese. I'm not trying to recreate home.

I realize how our daily interactions with other people are a way that we can reflect our experience back to ourselves. Maybe a way to feel our lives a little more deeply. And I still can't do that all in Chinese.

Yesterday, I was studying in Eslite 誠品, my favorite bookstore. During a study break, I went to the poetry section. There I found my "foreign friends". I found a book of poetry, sat my ass on the floor, leaned by back against the wall, and hung out with Mary Oliver, Derek Walcott, Rumi, Whitman, and some others.

Perhaps I have a need to go to that sublime place that intimate conversation with a good friend takes you, or in the case, poetry.

If you are in Taipei, and want to join me at Eslite for a little poetry, let me know, and perhaps we can both go to that place together.

你很幸運嘍!

唉,最近沒有寫文章.我希望我的粉絲不會那麼失望.不好意思!

為什麼我那麼忙,沒有時間連寫一篇小小的文章? 就是因為我在學中文!你不覺得這是一個非常好的原因吧?中文那麼難.你(我台灣朋友)從小到現在一直都講中文,已經念那麼多書.哇,你很幸運,我忌妒你.欸,不要說「英文也很難啊!」.你會看英文雜誌,對不對?是啊,就是,因為教育的關係,你不敢說話.我知道,很多人這樣回答.但,我沒有辦法看中文雜誌,一定要一邊看字,一邊查字典.

我以前認為中文跟英文一樣難,因為我的朋友一直都抱怨說英文的文法那麼難.但最近,我改變我的想法,覺得中文比較難.

到現在學了一年的中文.最近,我決定我一定要待在亞洲很久學中文.如果我今年才回國,我會認為我的一年的中文學習很浪費時間,因為以後就不會很流利地講中文.

Under Construction

We're sorry, this blog is currently under construction. I know lately you've been looking here for the exciting adventures of Chinese-Like Taipei Boy. Maybe you've been wondering, what is going on with him?

Way Back into Love

Uh oh, you're gonna really think I've fallen off of my rocker, because I'm about to post a video of a pop song on my blog. Not only that, but it's from a mainstream Hollywood movie that I went to see with my friend Emmy a few weeks ago.

Pop songs and Hollywood movies, I discovered, do sometimes contain eternal truths. There are many "ways back to love". Perhaps some of us are consciously looking for these ways, perhaps some of us aren't. Or, as someone once said, perhaps that's what we're all doing on this planet, whatever we're doing, and however messed up it all looks to everyone else.

So, I dedicate this song to all my friends and family. You know who you are. You are my way back to love. I am sending you blessings for love always.

Roni

The Magic of Yao Consulting

Specifically, Yao has helped people in the following areas:

• Image Consultation. Face it, image is important. Yao will suggest ways for you to change your image, like for instance, by wearing different sunglasses or getting a smashing haircut. If you are overweight, he will have his assistants surprise you and jump on you when you come to the office, and you will have to fight them, and you will probably lose a lot of weight this way.

• Financial Wealth. Find out the best ways to increase your financial luck. Yao will not only suggest lucky places to buy Taiwanese lottery tickets (based upon your birthday), but he also knows secret Daoist prayers and they have usually worked. If you have a lot of money, Yao will suggest investments that most fit your personality. One time, Yao recommended a client to invest in a pet store, and since then, she opened up a chain and has pet stores all over the place.

• Poverty Consulting. For those with little or no money who are always worrying, Yao also provides ways to manage the stresses of poverty. He recommends such clients convert to Buddhism, as it teaches that all life is suffering. He also can suggest "All-You-Can-Eat" restaurants located near large universities in Taipei. Also, you can save money on umbrellas because on most rainy days there are a lot of umbrellas right outside of most 7-11's and you can just take one.

• Mood. If you find yourself often feeling unhappy, Yao can help you change your mood. One way he does this is by calling his clients every day and saying in a very sweet voice, "You are so beautiful!" and "You don't need plastic surgery--honest." Also, if your mother is always yelling at you and asking you when you are going to get married, he will have a talk with her (he also knows a few words in Taiwanese, and you would be amazed to find out how Taiwanese mothers find it very cute) so that she will ease up a bit. This usually takes care of 90% of mood problems in Taiwan for people under the age of 35.

• Love. Many people find themselves lonely and longing to be with someone. Others feel like they have bad luck, meeting one asshole after another. Yao uses drastic means to help people realize that to find the love of your life, you really have to start with yourself. To begin the process, Yao will usually personally go to your boyfriend's (or girlfriend's) house and break up your relationship. In addition, Taiwanese clients are not allowed to use MSN anymore. You can't imagine how much more free time they have to go out and actually meet people.

• Job. Most people in Taiwan work too much at jobs they don't like, and for bosses who are too strict. Yao gives you qigong (氣工) exercises to do at work so that you sincerely enjoy your time there. In addition, Yao can teach you ways to keep your boss calm, such as putting calming herbs (and sometimes drugs that make him sleepy) into his coffee. Also, Yao's "One Year/Six Jobs" (1Y6J) Program has been extremely effective in helping people to get a better understanding of the workplace. In this program, clients get a new job every two months and either resign or try to get fired so that they can move onto the next one. Believe me, after a year of this, clients are very happy to stay in their next job.

These are just a few examples of the magic of Yao Consulting. Contact Yao Consulting now so that we can help you create some magic in your life!

Visit to Yilan

I was planning to go to Bali for my vacation, but my friend Wanling invited me to visit Yilan and so at the last minute, I cancelled my plans. It's no big deal--I saved a lot of money, and I hear that during this time of year, Bali is full of Taiwanese people. Luckily, I can get that right here in Taiwan!

So, right before the New Year, some friends (including my friend Kenny, who grew up on St. Kitts, an island in the Carribean) and I got on a train to Yilan.











Kenny, Cynthia, and me posing in front of "Double Happiness".

Wanling took us to the Luodong Night Market. Kenny refused to eat the stinky tofu. I took a bite and just smiled, saying, "Oh, it's good, but I'm full already!"











Stuffing our faces with nightmarket food.

Yilan is very nice. It's quiet and has a suburban feel. I know that's not usually considered good, but after living in Taipei, at least for me and my friend Kenny, it hits the spot.











Here we are being Taiwanese.

At night, we went back to Wanling's house and sang karaoke with her mom. I sang a duet with her in Taiwanese.











Wanling, thanks for inviting us. You are the best!

Yao Consulting

Hello, and welcome to Yao Consulting. We are please to offer our services to the citizens of Taiwan. After consulting with ourselves, we decided that today was the most auspicious day to open our Taipei branch. We plan on opening additional branch offices in Taichung (台中), Pingtung (屏東), Hualien (花蓮), and Penghu (澎湖). I know these aren't exactly the financial centers of Taiwan, but we got an excellent deal on office space which we couldn't refuse.

First, a little about Yao Consulting. Yao Consulting was started over ten years ago in California by Ron Elkayam (姚凱元; Yao Kai Yuan). Yao has degrees in psychology and Chinese medicine from extremely prestigious academic institutions. Not one to rest upon academic accomplishments, Yao says that licenses and degrees are worthless if you don't actually help other people get results. And that he has.

Over the last decade, Yao has helped people find happiness, experience more joy, increase their financial worth tenfold, and bring more creativity and love into their lives.

Specifically, Yao has helped people in the following areas:

• Image Consultation

• Financial Wealth

• Love
  

• Career

• And much more!

Stay tuned for more information about Yao Consulting's services. In the meantime, if you have questions, don't hesitate to contact us. We'll be happy to help you.

The Art of Tea

Since coming to Taiwan and having been accepted as a government-sponsored foreign scholar, I have been doing some intense studying on several important subjects related to Chinese culture.

Initially, I thought I might speak about music stores with good listening stations in Taipei, but the Office of Traditional Costume and Fashion Research (part of the Ministry of Education, and also in charge of managing and costuming foreign scholars), gave that one a big "不行" ("no way, Jose").

So, today I will speak about tea.

In many ways, tea represents the essence of Chinese culture. Varieties of tea abound. You've got your greens, your wulongs, and your black teas, to make a long story short. In Taiwan, wulong teas are preferred. Green teas are mostly gotten from 7-11 in plastic bottles and also contain lots of sugar, or sometimes, you can find a cafe here or there that serves authentic tea from Japan.

But today, we are not here to talk about Japan. Or Korea. Did you know that in the United Nations registry of holidays, the Koreans recently claimed Dragon Boat Festival as their "authentic" Korean holiday. Oh, come on Koreans. Are you going to claim Thanksgiving, too, as your own? I bet you will, and will also have TV shows with pilgrims.

Anyway, I am getting off the topic.

Why tea? I once heard that while coffee is prose, tea is poetry. Doesn't that just rock, as analogies go? I mean, think about a novel, one that you can't put down, a classic, like, say, . That's a cup of coffee. It keeps you enthralled and entertained, and when you can't read it, you sort of go through withdrawal. I also think coffee is like rocket fuel. Soon after drink it, you feel like you can conquer the world.

But then there's tea. When I drink a cup of tea, it slowly.